Marty Jenkins and the Vampire Bitches
"Love is something you stake your life on"
7.0/10
4.0
Released20061h 20min
"Love is something you stake your life on"
Reclusive vampires lounge in a lonely American town. They wear sunscreen to protect themselves. A descendant of Van Helsing arrives with hilarious consequences.
A duo of bisexual female vampires prey on passing motorists, whom they seduce and murder in the English countryside.
After three years of therapy Charley Brewster, now a college student, is convinced that Jerry Dandridge was a serial killer posing as a vampire. But when Regine, a mysterious actress and her entourage move into Peter Vincent's apartment block, the nightmare starts again - and this time it's personal!
A noted professor and his dim-witted apprentice fall prey to their inquiring vampires, while on the trail of the ominous damsel in distress.
Charley Brewster, a high school student, accidentally discovers the true and creepy nature of Jerry Dandrige, his dashing and enigmatic new neighbor; but no one seems willing to believe him.
Mark wants to lose his virginity, but his girlfriend wants to wait. Unfortunately for both of them, a 400-year-old vampire Countess needs to turn a virgin into a vampire before Halloween in order to preserve her own youthful appearance, and when she finds Mark, she turns his life upside-down.
When a group of naive teens working at a movie theater in a small Christian town discover a mysterious film hidden in its basement, they unleash an alluring succubus who gives them a sex education…written in blood.
A vampire attacks a horror author on the street and then invites him to a nearby club as a gesture of gratitude, which turns out to be a meeting place for assorted creatures of the night. The vampire then regales him with three stories, each interspersed with musical performances at the club.
A mousy librarian inherits her father's beloved but failing old movie house. In order to save the family business, she discovers her inner serial killer — and a legion of rabid gore fans — when she starts turning out a series of grisly shorts. What her fans don't realize yet is that the murders in the movies are all too real…
In the town of Dillford, humans, vampires and zombies were all living in peace - until the alien apocalypse arrived. Now three teenagers-one human, one vampire, and one zombie-have to team up to figure out how to get rid of the visitors.
Anthropologist Joe Weber takes his son on a trip to the New England town of Salem's Lot, unaware of its vampire population. When the inhabitants reveal their secret, they seek Weber to write a bible for them.
An LA vampire hunter has a week to come up with the cash to pay for his kid's tuition and braces. Trying to make a living these days just might kill him.
When a lawyer shows up at the vampire's doorstep, he falls prey to his charms and joins him in his search for fresh blood. Enter Professor Van Helsing, who may be the only one able to vanquish the Count.
Two fraternity pledges go to a sleazy bar in search of a stripper for their college friends, unaware it is occupied by vampires.
When their car breaks down, a couple on the run headed southbound for a fresh start in the Sunshine State break into a nearby house looking for a new set of wheels. What they find instead is a dark secret, and a sweet-as-pie pair of homeowners who will do anything to keep it from getting out.
While doing the inventory for a lingerie outlet in a high rise office building, five attractive women are terrorized by a series of bizarre killings. They suspect that the strange janitor, who witnessed another series of killings six months previously, is at the bottom of the whole thing. Little do they know the real horror that they face in the end.
Hazel runs a beauty salon out of her house, but makes extra money by providing ruthless women the oppurtunity to perform hit jobs. L.T. is a parasite, and contacts Hazel looking for work after he runs out of money. She is reluctant to use him for a hit, since she prefers using women, but decides to try him on a trial basis. Meanwhile, the cop she pays off wants an arrest to make it look like he's doing his job, but Hazel doesn't want to sacrifice any of her "associates". The sleazy side of life is explored in this delightfully dark and deadpan film.
Young Macy is abducted by a deranged, monstrous figure who wants to raise her as its child.
Milton, a college dropout, was only supposed to cook meth for one day. Broken out of rehab by a brash young woman and her trigger-happy ("ex") boyfriend and driven to a remote cabin the woods, Milton finds himself drawn into a dangerous love triangle gone haywire. The couple's deadpan half-truths spin around Milton like a song on repeat. They seem to read him like an open book, until a mysterious message opens his eyes to his cursed existence. With unlimited ammunition, any hunting tool they could desire, and an ever-growing body count, for what did Milton really sign up?
Private eye Rafe Guttman is hired by repressed, born-again Katherine to find her missing bad-boy brother. The trail leads him to a whorehouse run by a thousand-year-old vampire and secretly backed by Katherine's boss, televangelist Jimmy Current.
